Colonel Damian Warface.

Is not a family man. He is not a tax payer. He is not here for your stories about why you are here. He is tired of seeing through them. Where there is injustice, he may or may not be found. It depends on if it directly affects him. So figure out what rules you break before you break them because it behooves you to understand the context and consequences. Warface lends context and determines consequences: Sundays between the late game and the night game.

Colonel Damian Warface will come for you. He will also leave you be, to do your thing. I mean it really depends on if you are stepping on the wrong toes. Those toes being the ones belonging to the Colonel. If those toes remain undisturbed then the earth splitting, ocean parting, piñata blasting wrath that can only be brought by the most heartless of the most notorious will not then be brought. Figure it out.

Colonel Damian Warface is a fan, but not a fanatic. He finds Strengths and exploits them; he finds weaknesses and drowns them in a pool of pussy piss found at the bottom of the shoes of the last man to cross him. But he’s totally a great guy if you just get to know him. Don’t call him Damian.

One time at a convention on home security systems at the Hyatt downtown, someone approached the Colonel’s booth with questions about his laser surveillance system and he had to turn their insides out while explaining that what they had approached was in fact not a booth, but just an ordinary Colonel, trying to set his fantasy football lineups in maybe the worst “resident office facility” that he had ever seen in all his days on the road. But that was really just about poor demarcation of exactly where in the hotel people were setting up actual booths and displays for the convention.

Colonel Damian Warface wont admit it, but he’s pretty lonely a lot of the time. You gotta understand, when his reputation doesn’t precede him, he is easily caught up in trying to reinvent himself to the people that have never met him as the man that he always wished he was. So if you met him and didn’t like him try not to hold him to anything he said or did… Unless there’s a pending lawsuit. Then do what you must.

02/11/2007
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