Sometimes when I’m in the middle of a really awful and shitty experience with some of my friends, one of them will try to consol me by saying:

“Well, this will make a good story.”

Sure… good story. It won’t be a success story. No, it’ll be the awful story about the time that you blacked out and tried to kiss my sister because you said you thought she was me. Yeah, that’s a great story… if someone else is telling it to you. It’s a wonderful story to hear, it’s a terrible story to live. Tomorrow that might be a great story. Tonight, it is a terrible reality.

Between my friends and myself I get to witness some great slip-ups. What’s even better to see are the excuses people come up with. I love when someone screws up in life and then tries to defend their behavior by saying:

“Hey, I’m only human. Sorry about that, but I am only human.”

That has to be the biggest cop-out excuse of all-time. I’m only human. As if merely belonging to our species is an excuse for your behavior. There shouldn’t be consequences for what you do, because hey, you’re just a lowly human being.

Like we’re getting out-classed right now on Earth.

“Sorry about my actions, my species has been getting the best of me lately”.

As if there are better alternatives, setting a standard we can’t live up to.

“Sorry, but I’m only human. I’d like to do better for you but considering my species, I can’t promise much. I’m sure if I were a cyborg like a lot of you, I’d probably have handled that situation a lot better. Shit, think how well I’d have done if I were more like you Bill? That situation was tailor-made for someone who is half-man/half-god. Tailor-made my man-god friend!”

24/06/2007
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