I have a part-time job at a paint store. It hardly qualifies as a serious corporate position. I know this. It’s the kind of job that frequently reminds you of where you stand in life. Like everyday when my boss leaves work and says goodbye. I’m pretty sure that when Warren Buffet is finished with a long day of work at Berkshire-Hathaway, his parting shot to his underlings isn’t:

“All right ladies and germs, I am blowing this popsicle stand.”

That doesn’t seem like it would be his style. I doubt Warren considers Berkshire-Hathaway to be, ‘a popsicle stand’. I’m sure that’s not the only difference between Warren and my boss. I would have a hard time believing that whenever someone tells Mr. Buffet they have to use the bathroom, Warren quickly snaps back:

“Mention my name and you’ll get a better seat.”

Here’s another thing you probably never hear at Berkshire-Hathaway:

“Don’t work too hard.”

I hear that twenty times a day at work. It usually comes from the painters who shop at the store. I can’t figure out why we’ve all adopted this as a sign-off. Why do people feel the need to spread this mind-set? Is this something we need to be encouraging people to do? We’re at war. In two countries! The last time that happened was during World War II. If you had told someone in America during World War II, to not work too hard, you’d have been arrested. They would have snatched you up in the middle of the night, convicted you without a trial, and shipped you off to the desert in California to live with the rest of the un-Americans.

I heard this one the other day at work:

“Don’t let your meat loaf.”

I don’t even know what that means. Is that the opposite of don’t work too hard? Is a lazy man’s meat loafing? Does it even mean anything at all? I’d prefer it if it didn’t. I’d love to think there was some guy walking around town and ending all his interactions with people by saying really confusing things.

“Well, don’t fry potatoes on the back-right burner.”

“Don’t snack where another man is smiling.”

“Remember, French toast is free on Fridays!”

07/11/2006
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