Ban on child labor begins in India

Last week they vowed to eradicate polio, this week they’re taking on child labor, tune in next week when India plans to formally denounce Hitler and join the Allies.

At least 75 corpses turn up in Baghdad

In a related story on the home front today, seven wallets and fifteen sets of car keys turned up in Boston.

F.B.I. struggling to reinvent itself to fight terror

Navy blue suits and sunglasses can’t fight terrorism like they used to. The F.B.I. is currently considering changing its hair color, getting a more ‘boss’ car, and probably a piercing or two.

Evolution wins out in Michigan school curriculum

Three minutes into the fight, Evolution put Creationism in a submission move, forcing Creationism to tap-out.

Women wear more fashionable clothing when fertile - study

“Well, you look really nice today. You must be in desperate need of a baby.”

Melting Arctic forces Alaskan village to move

See what we’ve done? We’ve empowered the Arctic ! We’ve polluted the Earth so much that these poor Alaskan villagers have to move from the barren desolate sheet of ice they’ve called home for generations, to a new, barren desolate sheet of ice. And we call them the savages! We’re depriving these poor people the chance to eat raw seal and defend their families from starving polar bears. I hope everyone feels real pleased about what we’ve done here.

Christians force Slayer album out of India over cover

As expected, Slayer’s hard-core fan base in India is outraged. Three of the four people are currently planning hunger strikes.

White Sox to start games at 7:11 in a sponsorship deal

The deal is the second one reached this week between 7-11 and the sports world. On Monday, Terrell Owens was paid two million dollars to attempt suicide next year on July 11th.

19/10/2006
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